So, how do you regain someone's trust?

You can't. Once it's lost, it's lost.
You can still love someone as deeply as ever, but to fully trust him/her again would take a long time.

Maybe, never.

Sugar Rush. I know this series have been aired liked donkey years ago, but I absolutely love it. It makes me realise that it doesn't matter whether you're straight or gay to be hurt by love. I mean I've heard many stories by both guys and girls of how they turn gay as they were hurt by members of the opposite sex. But turning gay doesn't mean you wont get hurt ever. I have a friend who had a lesbian partner who cheated on her. So, whoever says gay relationships happen because women/men wont betray their lesbian/gay partners because they understand each other is utter rubbish. When it comes to love and relationships, you WILL get hurt. One way or another, minor or major heartbreaks.

Cheating, lying, betrayal, unfaithfulness... They don't gender discriminate.

I am currently hooked on Sonny with a Chance (thanks elsa), Dance Academy and Sugar Rush. Been watching the episodes back to back since 12pm. Its the best way to spend a cold, lonely Friday. Cheetos, ice cream and Youtube :) Yeah, I know, I'm a geek. Okay, Dance Academy is about to finish loading. Ima get back to my happy ritual :)))

I don't know why I've been so obssessed with interior design. Especially for bedrooms. I guess it stemmed from the outing to IKEA I had with Rasyad. Well, we were supposed to go swimming, but the swimming complex was closed. The day started raining and there was nothing else to do but to stay indoors. We were so bored of window-shopping so Rasyad thought of going to Ikea. We ended up 'planning' for our very own house. I swear it was one of the funnest date we ever had. Hence, my obsession for interior design was born.

While waiting for Sonny with a Chance to load on youtube, I CHANCED upon (get the joke.hehe) some pretty stuff.

Okay, the last one is not really related but the picture is sooooo adorabbbbbllllee. If you don't know, starting from the far left, it's Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Princess Jasmine, Cinderella, Belle, and Ariel. I don't know why. I'm just feeling extra girly-kiddy today :))))

WOW.

I was watching this indon movie when I remembered this incident of mine.

It happened on the night the girls, me and Rasyad went to Arab Street for dinner and leak session.

We took a cab home, and as I live in Tampines, I was the last one off.

Well, I was wearing this baggy cropped top, which slips up when I bend down or strecth. It so happen that while i was getting off the cab, my top slipped up alot due to the strong wind. And thanks to my luck, right behind the cab was this car full of MATS who were apparently dropping off one of their members. So when my top slipped up, the whole carfuk of mats so and they started laughing and whistling as though I was an act from the Cirque du Soleil. They literally went like this

I was freaking pissed at being made a spectacle that I felt like maiming them like this

I was so hoping that their car would crash and burn in front of me, but when they drove off, with satisfied smiles like children who just finished a whole bag of cheetos, all i could do was

‎22. I think you're one of those rare girls who is really good in a lot of things. You're smart, beautiful and have dancing as a talent! I love your eyes, skin-bare or in thick heavy make-up. ♥


aww elsaaa...

Gorgeous right? Baby, shall we?

I am a happy girl because:

1) I did well for my exams :))))

2) Today is my 19 monthsary = 1 YEAR 7 MONTHS :)))))

happyhappyhappyhappyhappyhappyhappyhappy

"Be careful if u make a woman cry, because Allah counts her tears.. A woman came out of a man`s rib.Not from his feet to be walked on, not from his head to be superior over, but from his side to be equal. Under the arm to be protected.. & next to the heart to be loved."

(via royalpains)

FUCK YOU.

My Sunday was terrifical. I started the day with Rasyad. We roam around Bugis Street for lunch at KFC and then to find my bangles. And did I mention I vomitted in a handicapped toilet at Bugis Junction? It was the most horrendous feeling ever. I was having this senak-feeling in my tummy, like when you're filled with angin and stuff. After lunch, the feeling got worst and I felt like vomitting, but cant. You know, that feeling? When I could not take it anymore, Rasyad bought me a can of 100 plus, saying it's his mother's remedy for senak perut. So, I drank and about ten minutes later, I was puking my guts out. But after that I felt so much better:)

For dinner, we met up with HIDAYAH, SHAIKHA, KAK NOR and her bf. Went to the food place opposite Kampung Glam Cafe. Hidayah was literally 'kelubur' and she was done with her plate 5 mins after they commenced the meal. I swear that girl's a monster. After dinner, Kak Nor and her bf went off and we headed for Sufi for lepak session. We were laughing so hard we cried.


Rasyad: Mata anjing kat tepi ke kat depan?

Yes, that was one of the topics we talked about. The eye position of various animals. Funny shit i tell you!

I enjoyed myself thoroughly. Love my girls and the boy so much :)

Sometimes i love you
More than you'll ever know
Other times you get on my nerves
That's just reality
No, it can't always be kisses, hugs, and beautiful words
You was looking for your prince, what you found
Is a pauper with potential
And no, i'm nowhere near perfect
But i'm around
Girl, time and patience is essential

This can only be as good as we both make it
Guess sometimes its gonna hurt
We can be as happy as we want to be, girl
But we gotta make it work

-Ne-Yo, Make it work

RELEVANT.

ALMOST got hit by the train doors. ALMOST.

All because I was rushing to meet YouKnowWho.

I'M SORRY SYG.

I just deleted the few posts.

I didnt mean to hurt you. I just thought I could use this blog as a medium to communicate to you how I feel about certain things. Things that i could not express. Why? Because I was egoistic, temperemental,attention-seeking, selfish, drama-queen.

Little did I know that by posting all those things hurt you badly. I didnt for a second imagine how you would feel. Instead, I was too damn selfish to think about myself, wanting you to see that I'm right in all those issues.

But now, i realise that what makes a relationship work, and I mean, REALLY WORK, is open and honest communication. I've learnt that whatever bothers me, I should just discuss it with you, no point writing it here as nothing would be solved.

Hidayah advised me that I shouldnt have posted all that as im "airing my dirty laundry to people". And she is right.

So, people, please do not think Rasyad is an ass. He really isn't. I'm the ass. He has been nothing but perfect to me, but I was too blinded by my personal drama to see that. My paranoia, my self-doubts and insecurities unfairly potrayed him as a jerk here. But he is not. Absolutely not.

I really love him so much. Despite me being uber mean to him, he still stood by me. He really understands why I do such things, and he doesnt judge me. Gosh, I'm such a mofo for not appreciating him enough, for misunderstanding him..

DM & WL for life :)

With you, it's possible.

"A year. A thousand kisses. And now a thousand one, a thousand two. There are so many other place we could have ended up, but I have to believe none of them would have felt this right. “All I want is you” is not entirely true. I want so much more, and with you I think I can get it."


— The Realm of Possibility by David Levithan

SHOUTOUT TO MY HOMEGIRL, ANGEL

I am really, absolutely grateful to have you as my breastie.

Your text made me feel at ease, knowing that I have someone to lean on when it gets too tough for me to cope. When my little heart get torn to pieces, I know you would be the one to put them back together as if it is brand new.

I love you baby girl. So much.

I miss these guys.

ANNNNNNNNDDDDD... it's over.

Well, my Art and History paper went pretty ok. Like I said, time and time again, essays are a very subjective lot. When you think you've written a goddamn excellen piece, your prof may not think so. *fingers crossed*.

Prof gave me a very disturbing smile when he collected my paper though. I cant decide whether it was a "You've done a fantastic job throughout this semester, Safirah" or a "oooohhh.. you so gonna fuck this one up, Safirah". Hate it when they give you those kinda reactions. Pfft.

Agenda for today: Wii ftw!!!!!!

Days of waking up early to study has fucked up my nternal clock. What the hell am i up this effing early for??!!

So, Imma head back to bed and wake up when my stick and nunchuk begs me to shoot some zombies.

LAST PAPER

Ok, ready get set go!

Tmr marks the end of my 1st semester as a Year 2 student. WOOOTS!

Besok, lepas paper aku nak lepak mcm kerbau. amaciaaam.

NOT! I wanna find a job fast. Dont know, maybe do some data entry shit. I very lazy want to work at retail places anymore. Alot of bitchezzzz. ugh.

Ok, back to studyingg.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ATOK!

Am currently waiting for Kak Shikin to get ready. Its been like, an hour already? And she still have no put on her clothes. Right now, she's on to blusher. After that, her hair.. and that would take another hour. Bummer.

We are actually going to Cik Din's house to celebrate atok's birthday! Yayness. Cant wait to eat eat eat. Confirm got all my favourite food coz Cik Din is cooking!

Well, the party suppose to start at 2pm, but had to be carried forward as the contractors at atok's place would only be done by 4pm. Which leads to another problem. I am supposed to meet Rasyad at 4pm :( I can sense he was pretty upset when I tld him that our date had to be pushed forward. Sorry baby.

Argh. Am so hungry. Faster caaaaaaannnnn.

ouh ouh agh agh! (monkey sounds)

Just found out neyo's girlfriend aka baby momma goes by the name of Monyetta Shaw.


Like seriously. I understand if its Lorretta, Bernetta ect. But Monyetta?! Oh, come on!

Current Living Conditions: The Sex.

Okay, before people start to let their imagination run wild, I'd better clarify. No, I'm not living on sex, or 'the sex'. Heh.

But more like my living 'quarters' are so much better right now. Okay, even if it is for a week, it's still heaven. The thing is, the place im living at right now (atok's place) is having some toilet renovations, HDB upgrading yadayadayada.. (Hint: Next year February). So, the current state of atok's house is very not exam preparation-friendly. So, I'm bunking in at Kak Shikin's house for about a week or so, until everything's done.

The reasons why I'm so happy is:

1) I have my own mattress.
2) There is aircon
3) Food is awesome
4) Toilet got heater

I know I sound very superficial and tak bersyukur with atok's house. Yeah, I'm grateful that I have at least a shelter over my head. But, you should try living there. Only you would know how I feel. I mean, I'm fine without aircon or heater or even a mattress. Seriously, I dont need all that. But there are some things that I cannot say here without reflecting bad on my family.

All that I can say is that I hope we can get a place of our own soon. Before he comes back.

Stomach growling like Jacob Black

Currently, am waiting for him in school. I have 4 hour break, and I kinda said that my laptop needs some retweaking from his 'magic hands'. So he is coming over to help, and then wait for me to finish lecture at 6pm, and we would then head to his place.

Well, actually, there's not much pressing issues regarding my laptop. There are some problems, but its not so urgent. In a way, I KINDA played the damsel in distress, to manipulate him to come. Manipulate is too strong a word innit? OK, so more like subtly coercing him to accompany in school. HAHA.

But he is so slow. I'm hungry.

Okay, 2 term papers down, one more to go...

My last term paper is for SC2213 - CHILDHOOD AND YOUTH. Basically, I have to interview a child or teen/youth and ask about his/her life during a 'normal week'. Then, analyse... blablabla.

I'm thinking of asking ELSA or NAZURA. They are still teens. Then I saw age limit 8-16. Haha. Both of them 17 already. so, not eligible. I want to do on my sister. But her normal week would be "EAT, SLEEP, WATCH TV, MEET BF". What's there to analyse??

The paper's due on 8 Nov. Time to panic-wanic.

Hell yeah, odd hours. ;p

COUCH

I love the couch.

You can put things on it.

You can sit on it.

You can lie on it.

You can eat on it.

You can do ANYTHING on it.

I really, really love doing things on the couch. ;)

For selfish reasons, I am praying as hard for you NOT to get the deckhand job. I cannot let you leave me for a year or two. I'll worry for your safety 24/7. I cannot function.

For rational reasons, I hope you get the deckhand job. It is for our future and to fulfill your dreams.

If you leave, no matter how we say things between us would not change, we cannot predict what will happen. We cannot foresee what is ahead of us.

I guess, all we can do is to have faith. If we are meant to be together, we will endure whatever life throws at us.

I believe in you.

I saw this in someone's tumblr. And this got so much reaction from the guys They go on complaining how it is so unfair for them, they have to do so much work to get it while the women gets it under 2 seconds.

Well fellas, I have 2 things to tell you:

1) Women have the power.

2)Women have the power.

BOOOOOYYYYYAAAAH!

I miss those boybands days.

Remember, there was a time where boybands rule the world? N-sync, Backstreet Boys, Take That, 5IVE and the list goes on... Gosh I miss those days. Why? Because things were much simpler.

I only fell in love with boys from boybands. I swear. I had near zero real crushes. All I could think of is Justin Timberlake, Nick Carter, JC Chasez... It was so much simpler then. Because you know deep down that although it is impossible to get them, it would not hurt in the long run. They cant hurt you coz they do not even know you.

But it's not so simple in reality. When you fall in love in reality, every single thing could be a potential heartbreaker. The very possibility of things going wrong is what makes it hurts so bad. The realness of it all creates so much worry and paranoia. Sometimes, the mere thought of things turning bad makes me keep the distance. I've always have this mentality that the longer it is, the more hurt it caused. That's why in my past relationships, I've really never made the effort to keep the relationship going. I could not care less. Because I know those relationships wont last, and to spare me from much heartbreak, I pushed them away. And when they did end, I felt nonchalant. Like nothing happen.

But now, with Rasyad, it's a totally different thing. I find myself giving my 150%. And its the fact that I'm too deep in this that I worry unnecessarily. I worry if we don't work out, or he strays, or someone intervenes. I worry so much because I know i cannot handle the pain if such happens. And that I cannot act as though nothing happened.

And no, we're not having any problems. We are perfectly fine in love :) And no, I don't doubt him or doubt our relationship. It's just something I tend to think about. Coz I really treasure this relationship like no other.

I will do this. Some day... (when i don't have term papers up till my nostrils)

Maple Pecan Crust

makes enough for 2 mini (3 inch) spring form pans

Ingredients:
1/4 cup graham cracker crumbs
1/4 cup pecans (ground in food processor)
2 tablespoons maple syrup

Directions:
1. Mix the graham cracker crumbs, ground pecans and maple syrup.
2. Press the mixture into the bottom of your mini spring form pans.

No Bake Cheesecake

makes enough for 2 mini (3 inch) spring form pans

Ingredients:
1 8 ounce package cream cheese (room temperature)
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup heavy cream (whipped)

Directions:
1. Mix the cream cheese, lemon juice and sugar.
2. Fold the cream cheese into the whipped cream.
3. Place the cheese mixture on top of the crust.
4. Chill in the fridge.

*striiiiiiiiiiiippppp* OUCH MUTHAFUCKA!

I guess that's how I'm gonna react if I ever get a brazilian wax. Haha. Been thinking of getting one ages ago, but im too pussy to get one. Get the joke? HAHAHAAH!

Anyhooo, Ima book an appointment some time next week when I get my 'pay'. I hope the other girls can make it. I need some moral support. One of them made a comment of how we might be put in the same room, with our waxing beds lined up next to each other. Wouldn't it be hilarious to see all 5 of us, legs spread, holding each others hands? HAAHAHA. If I'm not wrong, it was Fathiah or Elsa who said that.

Okay, now ima have to get on with my assignments *booooring*

(I miss the boy. So much.)

I'm DROWNING. I can't breathe. Somebody save me, please.

Damn, it hit me hard

I just read Hidayah's comment about missing her.

I guess, she has her reasons to say that. I have not been a great friend to her and Shaikha. I dont meet up with them always. I admit, most of my time is spent either in school, at home or with him. But its not true that I dont look forward to meeting or spending time with her.

I guess why I always turn down her offers to meet up, go for brunch, lunch, dinner etc is because of $$. Really. And I know some may think that this is just an excuse. But it is really the reason why I dont hang out with you guys etc. You see, whenever there's lunch/brunch/dinner outing, its always at places that is quite steep for me, in terms of prices. Like CoffeeClub, Heaven's Loft, Tab etc. I just dont have that much money to spend on such luxury. Sometimes, even eating McD's is an indulgence. It feels pathetic to only have $2 in my wallet when I go to school.

I know you guys may say that what matters is the time spend together, but it sucks when you guys order stuff that I cant afford. It sucks even more when you guys offer to pay. Its only on rare occasions that I have enuff money to go out and eat with you guys (eg, Nandos).

And sometimes, I really am caught in so much assignments that I dont join or initiate outings.

Its really not because i dont find you guys, I cant afford the time and $$. But that doesnt mean I dont miss you guys. Or dont wanna hang out. If I had my way, I would love to hang everyday after classes. You guys are always my stress-reliever.

I just dont know how to tell you guys about this without making it seem as though I'm making excuses. Its really what I'm experiencing right now. Hope you girls understand.

Epic.

Bruno Mar's mug shot for possession of cocaine

You're arrested for cocaine and your smiling like its the best thing that's ever happened to you in your mug shot?

Way to go, Mars. You're the man.

Just a random thought.

I do not want karaoke sessions during my wedding. I wanna hire a band, like a jazz band or something close to that, and I want them to play my choice of songs.

Top 5 songs:

1) Unbelievable- Craig David

2) Don't Change- Musiq Soulchild

3) Tercipta Untukku- Ungu

4) If I aint got you- Alicia Keys

5) Everything- Monica

There will be more malay/indo songs to cater to most of the older generations. Yeah, I would like the atmosphere to be like chilled/ laidback. I dont want the kecoh-ness of Karaoke.

Greek theme, yay or nay?

Its 2 more days and school starts yet again. Bummer. But then again, school's good. I can mug in the library... Yaay. Inner nerd is screaming to resurface.

Speaking of nerd, I am planning to get myself a pair of spectacles. Because my eyesight is failing fast. I need to squint to read the words on the screen during lecture. But not planning to buy those fancy-smancy one though. Just wanna get very plain-jane looking ones. I am not parading myself with the specs, just using them for lectures. I used to have plastic frames. (shudders at the memory), so I may want to venture to metal frames? But not those ray-bans ones please. Too YP-ish.

And oh, need to get me some new threads too.

Ever had a pimple on your forehead that hurts so bad it gives you headache? Well, Rasyad has one now. I swear its the funniest thing ever.

Oh, so its AVALON. Hmm.

Je n'aime pas. Je deteste.

And then, he proved me wrong :)

Gosh, I love him.

Sometimes, we girls feel that there's much to celebrate when our boyfriends finish NS. I was one of those girls. But now, it seems like much a complicated situation. I love him to bits, and I know he loves me too but somehow I feel like something's changed. He is not attentive anymore. I mean he used to be able to get my hints (no matter how subtle). He used to take initiative, but now I have to spell it out for him before he does anything.

I told him some things over the phone yesterday, and he came down to my place at 8pm to talk. He told me that he admits he has been unattentive, as he is to stressed out with finding a job, making sure he has a stable career for the future, our future. That's when I realised I have been too demanding after his ORD. I expect him to be with me everyday, fetching me from campus everyday.

Then again, i only have a week before he starts doing OT( and with this i mean not coming home for 2-3 days) and stuff. Is it wrong if i want him to use all the little time he has to be with me, fetch me from school? I know these little things are near impossible when he starts work. But why didnt he? I have the right to be selfish right? For a day? I even told him that I miss him fetching me from school. And i harboured hopes that he would fetch me yesterday, the last day he could ever do it. And when i didnt see him at the usual busstop, it felt like, damn.

And what scare me is that, I wasn't happy when he surprise-visit me at my house yesterday. (after telling him I was disappointed). I guess I really wanted him to fetch me, like for WEEKS, and up to the last day, my hopes were dashed. And no matter what he does after that, I was not happy. Grateful, but no happy.

I am horrible.

ALL-TIME FAVOURITE

I just caught Toy Story 3. I cried from the incinerator scene (where the toys held hands) all the way to the end. It was so touching. Toy Story has been one of my all-time favourite animated movie. And I am glad that the last one was superbly done. If toys can have so much compassion and love for one another, then we should too.

I AM IN LOVE WITH NICOLE RICHIE

I have a fetish for long dresses, thanks to nicole richie. I realise that she is a better person than paris hilton and she is so much better off on her own than being best friends with that skank. Like seriously. And her House of Harlow is freaking awesompossumz. I wisshed I have the moolah to buy stuff from her line.

I wanna get more maxi dresses. They are fuss-free, and oh-so-gorgeous. Baby, buy for me some ok. haha.

Okay, fasting month is just around the corner. And then, its aidilfitri!!! Have to set aside some $$ to buy baju raya. Saw this beautiful baju kurung.. stunning colour, intricate design and details. Cost an ass-whooping $350. Heartbreak when I saw the price. I guess there's no way i could get that. Firstly, its way too expensive. Secondly, we planning to get a couple set, and if I wanna get that, he has to get a matching suit. And I have checked, his cost a whooping $200. Good job. Baby said he will pay for both of us. How in the world is he gonna get $550? Haha. So scrape that idea girl.

And then there is the matter of school. I am in my 2nd year now. Thrilling, isn't it? I mean, 2 more years and I'll graduate and be thrown into the working year. Next stop, married life and motherhood. Scarry. Seriously, thinking about it excites me so much ima have to shit in my pants.


And did i mention, i love maxi dresses and nicole richie?

Safirah is a neurotic and demanding bitch who always expects her poor boyfriend to be perfect. Like 110% of the time. She would be so long-winded and would literally talk in alien language and expects that poor boy to understand her and say the right things. Come on, how can he marginally do that if she do not communicate with him. She keeps giving subtle hints, scenarios etc just so that he would say what she wants to hear. And this is just for the sake of boosting her insecured self- esteem. How pathetic. And when he doesn't say what she wants to hear, she makes the most awful tantrums and they would fight like its the end of the world. Which could be avoided if she had just been straight-forward.

Well, she has her reasons I guess. She wants to be pampered.

But then again, her boyfriend pampers her all the time, 99.9% of the time saying the right words to comfort her when she is in distress. He is only human who is bound to make mistakes.

So what is exactly her problem. She has the most patient, loving and understanding boyfriend she could ever possibly have and she goes around throwing tantrums.

She is so unappreciative. She puts her boyfriend in such a miserable state at times, but he still loves her unconditionally.

That's why sometimes i wish she was a different person. Someone who has no insecurities, no doubts, no painful past that prevents her from doubting this man.

OHMYGUCCI!

I swear, if i can grow a beard, my beard would have reached the floor. It has been donkey years since I last updated my blog. Gosh. So many things have happened till i don't know where to start.

1)Rasyad & Me

We have reached our first year together. Alhamdullilah, we have made it through all the bickering, arguments, tantrums, as well as laughters, teasings and mockery. (yes, we mock each other). And I'm happy to say that we will pull through for years to come. In fact, we will sail through. Insyallah. Recently, I helped out with Rasyad's Aunt's wedding so that was the very first official meeting with his entire family, grandma, uncle, aunt-in-laws all. Very nerve-wrecking, but things turned out smoothly. It definitely put our relationship in another level since both of us have been introduced to each other's family. And i'm glad they like me :))))))

2)Teater Tari Na'aim Pani

We are still going strong. We just had our very first combined show with all the other bigshot Malay dance groups at Taman Warisan for the event Zapin D'Muara, in conjuction with Singapore Arts Festival. We had many positive comments despite us being the baby of the lot. So we are thankful for the opportunity which was definitely an eye-opener for us. Looking forward to more collaborations in the future. Currently, we are busy preparing for our overseas trip to China in July. We are preparing a repertoire for an hour show. Alot of work and effort indeed.

3)NUS
My year-end results. Sigh. I didn't do badly. Was just hoping I could get all A's. But a few B's aint that bad right?

4)Besties
Angel is in France :( Cant wait for her to get back. Shaikha is a very very very corrupted teacher. Angel and Hidayah, you shoul know what i mean ;) And my dear Hidayah, always running around dealing with work, school and scandals. The hotel incident was an epic classic ;)

I wonder why...

Sometimes I wonder why people tend to make accusations, assumptions etc about others without actually knowing what has been happening in their lives and by simply reading small snippets of their continous, ever-changing lives. Yeah, sometimes people dont practice what they preach coz everyone, in certain stages of their lives, do "fall". But that doesnt mean they do not come back up and realise their mistakes. And when people change for the better, only their loved ones know as they do not have to announce to the whole world HEY I'VE STOPPED CLUBBING or HEY I'VE STOPPED DRINKING.

And i realised too, that sometimes, wrong usage of words, or purposely eliminating certain details, could lead to these assumptions, accusations and imagery taking place. Because only close ones would understand the intended purpose and meaning of certain words and sentences. I guess people cant help but to let their imaginations run wild. I dont blame them, though. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions.

So, i vow to choose my words carefully. Freedom of speech, but with caution.

If any of my posts disgust, offend or in anyway inflict harm or cause psychological trauma to others, I apologise with greatest sincerity. Hope my apology appeases those affected. If not, they can just simply stop reading my posts. Simple as that :)

BOUNCE.. Like your ass have the hiccups.

Currently listening to FREAKUM DRESS by my baby girl B. Hellava song. Every girl has a freakum dress, and she should wear it when the time comes. Mine's a super short, backless little black dress. YEAH RIGHT SAFIRAH.

Anyway, I had an awesome-possumz time with jungle-boy. It was our very first V-Day celebration and it was indeed the BEST V-DAY celebration ever! It beats the expensive dinners, expensive flowers and expensive teddy bears i got from all the previous assholes in my life. We spent the whole day at ECP( yeah, i guess its our ultimate fav spot :D), pitched a tent and sweated our pits out. The weather was like... freaking hot. The boy stripped to his boxers and though i would LOOOOVE to do the same, i only when as far down to my tshirt and mini-shorts. It felt as though we were in CUBA. haha.

We had board games marathon. Monopoly, UNO stacko and twister. AWESOME :). And during monopoly, I seduced him and got a free land :) The power of seduction brings you to greater heights :) haha!

Then, night-time came and again.. AWESOME.

HAPPY 8TH-MONTHSARY!

Spent the whole night with Jungle-Boy yesterday. We went to Lagoon at ECP for dinner. Yums. Ate bbq chix wings, ikan pari bakar, mee goreng etc.. sedap to the max and we were both full and looked as though we were 3 months preggers. haha. We then took a beautiful, romantic stroll down the beach and went to our favourite spot. We really went old school for our month-sary celebration. We went back to the time where we used to spend our dating days hanging out by the waterbreaker and just talked till dawn came.

And we did just that, we sat by the waterbreaker, sippping MacD's hot tea and just enjoying the time together. It has been a long while since we last did just that. Enjoying each other's company without any disturbances and endless calls by people. Both of us have been real busy with our own stuff, him with NS and me with school. So having that nice quiet time together really helps to rejuvenate us. Then, about 5.30am, we headed for the busstop and waited for the first bus.


So baby, where next for our 9th month-sary?

I almost got knocked down.

I crossed the road using a pedestrian crossing. It showed the green man. It wasnt even blinking. Unknowingly, I walked across the road, while looking down on the ground, which I always do. But I had a sudden impulse to look up. The very second I looked up, a car zoomed right infront of me. If I had walked a second faster, I would have been knocked down by the car. The driver beat the red light.

I wasn't even mad a the driver. Iwas too shocked too feel so. All I could thing of was to quickly run up to my house and quickly take a shower. Only during my shower did i realise how close I was to death. I broke down. I couldn't stop crying.

The sight of the car zooming right under my nose still freaks me out.

And the honourable mention goes to..

So, this semester, my undying attention, blood, sweat and tears would go to French 2, Employee management in Singapore, Sociology- Culture and society, History and Japanese Studies. Yay. Coz these were all the modules that i bidded fiercely for and I got them. So far, I've went for History, Culture and Society as well as Employee management. And I'm loving all of them. The lecturers are great and inspiring in a way. Especially Employee management. Despite the lesson being 3 hours straight, never once i felt like dozing off. Congrats Saf! Proud of ya!

And another gorgeous human being whom I'm extremely proud of is Angelina Tan Sihui. From her tumblr entries and FB status, she has been very self-disiplined in achieving her goals. Good job sweetheart! Keep it up!


Last but not least, my jungle-boy. He took his course seriously this time. Took down every goddamn note and scribbles. He really put his mind in excelling in his course and im so so so proud of him. He always say that I inspire him, made him change for the better. But little does he know that secretly, I admire him too. His determination, perserverance to hold on despite what shit life throws at him. He still remains jovial and focussed even though he faces multiple problems every single day.

That's why i'm extremely proud of my boy.

"All i need in this life of sin, is me and my boyfriend"

-Jay-Z & Beyonce, "Bonnie and Clyde"

I need to learn to better manage my time.. To be able to give equal attention to my priorities, commitments and obligations.

Because I miss my HIDAYAH and SHAIKHA so fucking bad.

I got a feeling, that tonight's gonna be a good night

Above are 4 of the kezillion pics we took on NYE. More on FB, so go check it out. Anyway, our first stop was City Hall to catch the fireworks at the Memorial, or better known as "Chopsticks". It was super gerek siolz. We played with sparklers as the launched (launched?) the fireworks. Then, we like kinda stick the sparklers on the ground and had a mini fireworks display of our own. Haha. But cant upload the sparklers pics as they are with Azhari and he still has not upload them yet. maybe he doesnt want to. Bleurgh. AND as usual, the boys drank like there's no tmr. Not for me. I have TAUBATed. hehe.

After that, we adjourned to Clarke Quay and "participated" in the countdown party at the heart of Clarke Quay. God, it was freaking hot sia. Me and jungle-boy sweated right to our pits. we looked like we just ran a marathon. But gerek ah. We danced like crazy and it was my sis's first partying experience and hell she was wild. Wilder than me!

When that dancefloor ended ard 2am, we went bar-hopping. First stop was YELLOW JELLO, Aliff's fav spot. Again, the boys drank and drank. Irritating abit la, but cant get angry coz i did take a few sips here and there. Sorry la, temptation to great had to sidetrack frm my vows abit. anyway, its the new year what. so no harm taste abit abit right?? After that we went to CUBA LIBRE for like 5 min, dance dance, then went to HIGHLANDER, dance dance for ten min, then went to THE PUMP ROOM, decided it was crap, went back to HIGHLANDER, decided it was getting crappier then we went out. Like stopped. Then me and jungle-boy decided to split from the group of ard 6 guys( they joined us later in the night which was weird coz one of them is my uncle's fren and the other used to date my sis. like wtf) and we went to chillaz at BOAT QUAY to have heart-to-heart talks. Somewhat emotional, but puts back the perspective in our relationship :) Finally, we took the train, dropped at TAMPINES and ate breakfast at MACS.

But somehow, i didnt really felt the kick partying. Kinda regretted going to Clarke Quay. My love for that place has diminished greatly. Maybe coz im tired of partying. I'm bored of it coz its always the same thing over and over again. First u feel damn high, then when lethargy kicks in, all u think about is ur comfy bed, and when its morning is when u feel the crappiest due to hangovers and stuff.

I'd rather have like small gathering with loved ones. Quality time spent. No hangovers, no muscle cramps.